THE NOT SO STRAIGHT TIMES
VEGETARIAN - A FATAL LIFESTYLE.
Recent discovery from the laboratory of Lamus InCo has disputed the fact that vegetables are good for you.
A team of scientist, led by the eminent Professor Corn-e, has discovered that actually, the consumption of vegetables is a major factor contributing to global warming.
"It's simple logic actually" said Prof. Corn-e when interviewed. "Global warming is caused by too much greenhouse gases, mainly carbon dioxide and methane. And plants uses up carbon dioxide to make food and releases oxygen back in the air."
"By consuming vegetables, we are actually decreasing the number of plants, which will increase the amount of carbon dioxide in the air, especially with the increasing world population. More people breathing you see" he explained. "Which is why vegetarians are actually killing us all because they are destroying all our oxygen-making-carbon-dioxide-clearing-natural machines"
This discovery has received full backing of the chairman of Lamus InCo, Dr P. Brain.
Dr. Brain had gone so far as to write up a proposal for the Congress of Lameland to ban vegetarianism and promote the consumption of meat, especially of beef.
"Its amazing why no one had seen it before! The cows are killing us by the release of methane when they burp and fart. So we should solve that problem by eliminating the cows and not eating and planting more plants. We should definitely save our ailing world."
"Anyhow, green is a weird colour for food to be" he added, and agreeing that he is a born carnivore and hates all thing green.
When asked of his confidence whether his proposal would be looked upon favourably, Dr. Brain replied with much confidence, "Absolutely."
The Congress of Lameland are currently reviewing the said proposal, and the parliment's opinion will be published in about a month's time.
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Editor's note: We had to pre-empt our article on the real reason for bird flu due to the serious threat from the bird terrorist's grp. Their leader, Birdsama bin Chirpchirp had threatened to send in his kamikaze birds and to pelt the Orange House (where our honorable President resides) with eggs if such article was published. We apologised for raising any hope and not being able to deliver even a feather.
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